Please stop controlling me

See you know what gets me. When you can hear your mum and your boyfriends over protective step-mum talking about you and him on the phone. The thing is we are so close and in love. Im sick of people doubting that. We have self-control. Why do you think that we dont. This step side of the family has been pulling us apart for a year now and all of a sudden we ask if we can do something they say its fine then call my mum to discuss me and his relationship. We are together for better or worse we know God wants us together he has made it clear to us. I can't believe no one else believes us. We are in love and i feel like no one wants to support us. Mum does sometimes then all of a sudden goes and does something that makes me question weather or not she wants us together. Im listening to this phone call conversation and mum knows it. They are going on about their 'concerns.' Somebody please tell me how a couple who didnt date for a full year to respect their parents and have stuck to all the stupid and annoying boundaries can be a concern. We have spent our time building our relationship based on God's love and what he wants for us and yet it still isn't enough. It makes me feel like i just cant get anything right. Me and him have done everything they asked and more and just done everything humanly possible to be kids that they can all be proud of and yet somehow they still have a whole bunch of things to discuss that are concerning. Im sick of people trying to run my life and control me. I'm over it. I dont know how to put this across though. I mean its not like i can walk up to his step mum and dad and say oi we did what you asked it put us through alot of crap from friends and other people. I mean I got bullied by people to be  with your son and I respected a rule that wasnt even for me for a whole flipping year. I just have to suffer in silence. Cant wait till im 18 -.-

Gahhhh!!!!

Please be loving

I feel like your drifting

Text me back

LET YOUR YES BE YES AND YOUR NO BE NO!!!

Im begging you

Fakers??

What do you do when you think people are your friends and then they go and change?
Do they actually want you as a friend or do they just find hurting you a good let out of their anger?
How can you really tell??
I feel really alone :(

To see them SMILE :)

I love seing people smile

It is truley contageous.

I love making people smile

Lifting their spirits

Giving them Hope

The truth is when others are happy

I generally am

I love when a friend comes and makes me laugh

Or giggle

or Smile

Smiles are taken for granted in today's world

Smile more

Truly. it makes you feel so good

Falling...

I'm so over people being to busy or too wrapped up in their own lives to care. At this current point in life I feel like I have a sudden lack of friends. I have maybe 3 or 4 people I know I can depend on. Everyone is either too busy with their new popularity roles or too wrapped up in themselves and their own seperate little clicks to notice that I sit there sometimes when my man isn't there and feel like screaming. I rekon if I did no one would even notice. I end up segregating myself off and sitting with just him because I dont really fit or belong with anyone else. I love having someone that I fit and can be myself with. He leaves school soon though. What do I do next year when I sit there at the tables with my friends and mindlessly smile and put my mask back on. People wouldn't believe that I'm not a cryer. I never was then this year happened and it's been such an emotional rollercoaster. I know though that next year I will just fall back into myself at school. I don't want to but I dont feel very accepted  in my group anymore. I have ike 2 girls who dont judge me when I do something weird or wrong. And like 2 guys other than my man that actually act like they care. The rest of the guys follow a couple of the other girls like mindless zombies and the other girls all look at me funny or dont laugh or i have heard about talking behind my back. I am sick of the fakeness in the world. I need to know who my real friends are and who is just gonna throw me off as soon as i'm not what they want me to be. I mean one person suppost to be my best friend changes how they act around me constantly and I dont know where I stand. The truth is I'm petrified of next year. I'm afraid that I'll get left at school. With no one.....

Your Love is a Song - Switchfoot

I hear you breathing in
Another day begins
The stars are falling out
My dreams are fading now, fading out

I've been keeping my eyes wide open
I've been keeping my eyes wide open

Ooh, your love is a symphony
All around me, running through me
Ooh, your love is a melody
Underneath me, running to me

Oh, your love is a song

The dawn is fire bright
Against the city lights
The clouds are glowing now
The moon is blacking out, is blacking out

So I've been keeping my mind wide open
I've been keeping my mind wide open, yeah

Ooh, your love is a symphony
All around me, running to me
Ooh, your love is a melody
Underneath me, and into me

Oh, your love is a song
Your love is a song
Oh, your love is a song
Your love is strong

With my eyes wide open
I've got my eyes wide open
I've been keeping my hopes unbroken
Yeah, yeah

Ooh, your love is a symphony
All around me, running through me
Ooh, your love is a melody
Underneath me, running to me

Your love is a song
Yeah, yeah
Your love is my remedy
Oh, your love is a song

The first time I heard this song I thought of you. Everytime I hear it I think of you.

Sour Coke Bottles and Dark Chocolate :)

He can always make me smile, Now & Forever

Love :)

.

The first time I saw you was in the tuckshop line.
You threw your arm around a mate as a joke and i giggled at you.
You turned around to see who it was and in that moment I knew

Your big blue eyes looked at me and I was like 'wow'

I left that line thinking about how handsome you were and how I should just let it go cause you were a grade above and I would never get a chance to see you.

Music Camp February 2010.

You were there. The first night we went bowling and you were up to bowl next to me everytime. You made flirty little comments and smiled at me when ever we looked at eachother. The next day you would look up at me from the table across at breakfast. In practices you would pull faces at me andd make me giggle. That night at bush dance you were dancing with all your mates in the middle of a circle of us and ran out just to hold my hand and ran back in.

Back at school you told me you liked me. almost 10 months later I'm still unconditionally and totally in love with you. Love of my life, my soulmate and best friend. I fall more and more in love with you everyday.

Sitting in Music Listening to Jazz

Just sitting in music listening to a video about jazz with music in the background. I love jazz. The beat, the way it makes me wanna dance. Love it

What's wrong with people today??

Im getting a little sick of people. Why do we as humans hurt others just cause we feel hurt. I dont see how that is fair at all. We need to look at things differently. Its not about us. Why is it ok for people to take out their pain on eachother. It's not ok. If someone has a problem deal with it yourself not by hurting other people.

New Comer

Hello to all,
Well I have never had a blog before but i have reached a point where diaries are for kids and i cant write to a book, oh and i prefer to type.
At this stage in my life I am hitting some rough spots, some awesome stuff and some stuff that im just plain lost about.
I thought well, why not. lets try this
I am currently a typical teenager and need somewhere to vent and share my stories
So here it is my first attempt at a blog